I had my freakout over my grandmother’s situation on Saturday, and I thought I was doing better on Sunday, but yesterday and today, I just feel this awful sense that I’m alone and no one would ever understand how I feel right now.  I know it probably has something to do with my grandma’s dementia and the fact that she’s declining.  A lot of it has to do with this feeling that the Universe is a really bad place if it allows things like this to happen to her.  I feel alone and scared in a bad Universe full of people are looking to screw you over when you’re the most vulnerable, like my grandma.  I feel so sad and awful and there’s work to do and I can’t get myself together…I don’t like feeling this way.

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3 Responses to sad

  1. ainsobriety says:

    The universe is full of good people. And scared people who sometimes act from a place of fear.
    You are not alone. Hug


  2. Pamela says:

    Is there someone you can really confide in? So many horrible things and illnesses happen to really good people and it can leave us feeling as though life isn’t fair…but there is so much good in the world and amazing acts of kindness and grace that happen every day..! It is very difficult to see someone you love decline…big hug to you…you will get through this!


  3. Sober Geek says:

    Thanks for the encouragement, guys. I am feeling much better today. I did talk to my partner about how I was feeling, but I guess sometimes I just have to feel the way I feel until I don’t feel that way anymore, you know? I also got in touch with a good lawyer to help my grandma with her issue. She’s 91 and her reverse mortgage company is trying to wrongfully foreclose on her. It’s a really scary thing to me, and now I feel like I have some power, so that helped a lot.


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